Post-Emily: be Savvy this V-Day. Forget Hallmark.

Through movies, advertisements, television shows and Hallmark cards, we have been conditioned to view Valentine's Day as heart-shaped chocolate boxes and red roses. No matter the stage of your relationship, there are different rules to go by. Chocolates and roses may not necessarily be the gift to give. Valentine's Day has a different meaning to different people, doing too much or too little when the other person doesn't necessarily feel the same way about Feb. 14 can be problematic, spelling trouble for a new relationship. If you are unsure about what to give someone you have just met, your partner of a couple months, or your committed soul mate this coming Valentines Day, read on. When you have just met: When planning your Valentine's Day out with someone you have just met, it is unrealistic to expect a big, romantic celebration. That doesn't mean you can't go out and do something fun. Try to be more original and natural rather that donning your red bow tie or glittering rosy dress and heading out to the fanciest restaurant in town. Let this date be a joint effort and communicate with your partner rather than surprise them. Agree on an activity the two of you would enjoy. If you sense the slightest bit of hesitation on your new partner's side, don't push it. Schedule a date for another less-contrived day. After all, you just met him/her; they could already have made plans. If the two of you do get together that day, should you bring a present? It's okay to bring something small, that way if your partner did not get you a gift it won't be a huge embarrassment. A small gift that is not a profession of your undying love can be a thoughtful gesture. No matter what you choose to do, be prepared to not receive a gift from the other person. Go into this without expectations, it will make it much more relaxing. You've been dating for several months: At this point, you either know the person you are with is "the one" or you just have a great time with him/her. Regardless, if you have been exclusively dating for a few months, it is natural to expect to make Valentine's Day plans. You still should communicate with your partner about making plans though. Say something like "Valentine's Day is two weeks, do you want to make plans or pretend it doesn't exist?" How the person reacts will be a good test of where your relationship is going. If you're opinions differ, try to reach a compromise. In terms of gift giving, it is more expected if you have been dating for several months. But do not take this to mean that you can go out and splurge on some ridiculously extravagant memento of your devotion to him/her. Try to get something meaningful, that shows your partner that you make an effort to know what he/she likes. Giving a gift the two of you could enjoy, perhaps tickets to a game if you know your partner is a sports buff, or a night away together - can guarantee more shared good times together. When you are in an established relationship: At this point, you have probably had plenty of cheesy Valentine's Day adventures. Though, at this stage if a relationship most people stop putting so much emphasis on this day. But it is important not to take a relationship for granted - make an effort. If you know your girlfriend loves Valentine's Day and buys a brand new red pair of heels every year, you better surprise her with something special. Again, it doesn't have to be your typical candlelit dinner, but be sure not to plan a hiking trip if she is the red heel fanatic. Just saying, that might not end well. Maybe it's wine and cheese and a movie in your PJ's at home - make the night about enjoying each other's company. Who knows, you might have been so busy with work or school that Valentine's Day is that break that helps the two of you come together. If you've been dating for several years the biggest minefield is probably whether or not to get engaged on Valentine's Day, which tends to be a popular time for popping the question. Take a little advice, don't give in to this pressure unless you are seriously feeling it is the perfect moment. But if there is the slightest doubt about it, there are 365 days in the year. Pick another one. If you are not at that stage yet, a gift that shows how much you respect, love, and know your partner is the best bet. It may not be the most romantic thing to get, but maybe some long underwear for the sweetheart that is always cold could be both thoughtful and funny. A nice piece of jewelry that is NOT a ring is always a good way to go as well. Enjoy this Valentine's Day to the fullest, but remember, no expectations equals no disappointments.